Saturday, August 14, 2010

Regrets...Yeah, I've got a few.



Do you ever have that feeling of regret; the kind that eats away at you for not calling or stopping by to see an old friend--but now it's too late to do that? That's what I have today.

This is the second time in as many years that I'm feeling this way--and it's my own damn fault.

The first time was last year, when my friend JohnK passed away. I hadn't kept in touch with him, I did (and still do) with his wife--my best (non-family/marriage) friend, Titanica. But John, not really--I never kept in touch with him (except, if you want to call it contact, playing games with him on Facebook). He was the one who got me out of my shell the second time.

When I was younger I was what you call a "wall flower". I didn't have many friends, I kept to myself (or hung around with the people that I did wind-up making friends with, who weren't very many--I can count them on one hand). When I went to college, I started working at a place called the Mercer Mall Cinema. This is where I started coming out of my shell. JohnK was working at a new comic shop that opened up in the Mall (this was back in 1985-86). So I went over to the comic shop and JohnK befriended me. (I remember exactly how too: I would go in, look around, get my comics, pay and then leave. One day John took the time to actually strike-up a conversation with me...and voila: a friendship was born (which brought about my friendship with Conlon and then Titanica).

I said he was the second person. The first person was a wonderful lady named Ingrid Kazsuba. She worked at the General Cinema movie theatre (along with her husband Stan). I needed a job (so my Daddo told me--"get a job or you won't have a car"), so I saw an add in the newspaper for part-time work at the theatre. I vivdly remember the day I went in to fill-out the application: Mike Homes, Jim Trembley and Ingrid Kazsuba were at the theatre that day (working as ticket cashier, usher and concession person)...Jim and Ingrid were chatting with me while I filled-out my application; Mike coming out and chit-chatting along with them. I finished my application, gave it to Ingrid who said she'd give it to Hank (the Manager). I didn't really think much about getting the job there, but I did. Hank called me the next day for an interview and a "test" (math test: can you add and subtract? good, your hired -- you start Friday (they didn't have cash registers for the concession at that time--we were still low tech--a drawer with cash in it [taxes were already added into the price of the item you wanted])).

I remember my first day there too...It was a Friday in September 1985: and, we were under a hurricane watch (Hurricane Gloria); and I remember Bruce outside taping the front windows with masking tape--but we didn't close. Ingrid and Diane were teaching me the job of being a "concessionist" (mainly it was me and Ingrid behind the counter and Diane was the ticket cashier and Bruce and someone else were the ushers). Those were such fun times.

I'm bringing Ingrid up because she has passed-on to the other side (or whatever redemption you think you get when you die). My regret is that I didn't keep in touch with her.

I found out via Facebook e-mail from my friend Jeff (who heard it from his sister Jill -- both of who also worked with Ingrid at the movie theatre).

There's not going to be a funeral service (it's listed as "private family ceremony" only). I did see that Diane was listed in the obituary as "family friend", so that's nice to know that someone from the old crew kept in touch with her. I think Jill did also.

Me? I kept in touch through holiday cards. Every holiday I'd send a card to Ingrid; and she'd send one back to me. Recently, a couple of times she's written that I should stop by and see her...but I never did. And that's the kicker for me. I had the opportunity, but I never followed-up with it.

Where am I going with this post? Nowhere really. I'm using it as a tool to get my anguish out...and I apologize for that. But I don't really have anything else to use to get the pain out.

If anyone gets this far, I'm sorry if I didn't entertain today (Happy Caturday by the way). I'll try to be more happy the next time I post.

More later [but not like this].....Booboo

No comments:

Post a Comment